A Difficult Post

A QUESTION

Last night in my community group the icebreaker question was this:

            Name one thing that you are good at.  (Yeah I know…not really a question, but I kept my mouth shut.)

Then of course we had to go around in a circle and everyone has to share.  First off I hate that.  I hate the expectation of having to answer. 

 

A CONFLICT

The problem was I really couldn’t think of anything.  I ended up giving some BS response that I didn’t really believe.

 

A COMMENT

Now I’m not looking for pity or responses on what you think I’m good at.  Even if you were to offer a valued opinion I probably can’t accept it at this point as it would seem to me only a response to this post.  Not necessarily genuine in my eyes.  However, I’m sure you, my readers, are incredibly honest people, although a little foolhardy to be following/reading what I spout out.   

 

A CLARIFICATION

And what I’m not saying is that I’m not good at anything.  I have a good sense of humor and a good amount of patience and I’m incredibly good looking.  Also I have a good sense of humor and a good self image.  If golden stars were passed out for Seinfeld quoting skills, well…I’d have a lot of golden stars.  And I can list several other things, but moving on, what I am also not saying is that I don’t have things that I enjoy doing either.  (That’s a poorly constructed sentence, but I don’t feel like fixing it).  I love to organize things.  I love bring order where there was chaos.  I love youth and youth ministry.  I love sharing the Bible.  I love doing a lot of things.

 

Some of my negativism is because I’m my own worst critic, but some of it is because really I don’t know what I good for.  You can be good at things, but unless you are acknowledged and appreciated and using your talents, what is…what you’re good at…good for?  Being good at something and not using it is worthless.  If you have NBA talents but never pick up a basketball, are you really good at the sport?  Loving something that seemingly refuses to embrace you, well that just seems sad.  If you are the second coming of Jimmy Stewart, but never win an acting audition are you really a good actor? 

 

A CONFESSION

Just a peak into what steals my joy and robs my passion:

I feel like the past couple of years my hope has diminished and I’m fading into oblivion.

And I don’t know what to do with that.

 

[I don’t know if I’ve shared this with anybody, opening myself up this much (and this isn’t much).  And I can’t say why I feel the need to do so tonight.  This is me trying to be more honest, and this seems to be my most effective forum for speaking this kind of truth. - TSH]

 

 

 

Audible

I had somewhat an off week when it came to listening to sermons.  But here are a few you may want to check out.  I think it was Rick Warren who called today’s sermons, yesteryears commentaries (something like that).  I totally agree.

 

Sermons I Listened To This Week

• First off at church Steve Dye preach on How’s My Neighbor: Orphans and Widows
• On Monday I listened to Mark Scott, Dean of Academics at Ozark Christian College.  His sermon was entitled Love the Church More Honestly (Rev. 2-3) from a series called Living in the Real World.
• Then I listened to an archived sermon by Damien Spikereit, preaching professor at Ozark Christian College.  His sermon was entitled Kiss One Another, from a series entitled Life Together where they were going through all the One Another passages in Scripture. 
• Wednesday (I think) I listened to Chip Ingram preach at Southeast Christian College as a guest speaker.  Jim wrote a book titled Good to Great in God’s Eyes, and that also the title of his message.  This was an interesting message.  A little self-help-ish, but was worth the listen.
• Today I listened to Jon Weece, senior minister at Southland Christian Church in Lexington, KY.  He preached an amazing sermon from their series called BREATHE.  BREATHE is an acronym, each letter representing an action that are immensely beneficial in daily life change.  The E stood for Examine Myself with a Fearless Honesty.  Jon is an amazing preacher.  I’ve met him at Ozark briefly and he is legit.  He reads a letter from an eleven year old girl in this sermon that is heart breaking - - yet beautiful.  Listen and be challenged.
• I listened to a second Jon Weece message as well today from the BREATHE series entitled Amend My Relationships. 

 

 

Nothing else I'd rather NOT do

See world's first eyeball tattoo - - careful this is gross and painful.

Confessions (Part 2)

I hear Usher’s song in my head.  “These are my confessions…” 

Unfortunately when I loving sing to myself in the mirror and rip off my shirt it just ain’t what MTV wants on the air.  Then again Jack Blacks had a few shirtless hits.

“I’m good enough.  I’m smart enough.  And doggone it people read my blog.”

 

But that’s not what I want to confess.  Here’s my second confession of the day.

 

When at Chick-fil-A I like to say “thank you” a lot.

Apparently when someone tells a Chick-fil-A employee “thank you”, the employee must reply with “It’s my pleasure.” 

I think this is a little odd, but I still like it.  It’s not “not a problem” or “you’re very welcome”.  It’s much more intimate of a statement. 

“It’s my pleasure.”

 

Plus when I happen to get the cute lady who works there to takes my order and she says “it’s my pleasure”. 

However, when a guy takes my order I try to never thank them, that’s oddly uncomfortable.

Confessions (Part 1)

Two confessions today.  I’ll post the second soon enough. 

 

This morning it did not take long until I was suffering from a headache.  After 29 years I have finally decided to get contacts (mainly because the examination, the trial lenses and the tutorial only cast $20 more with my regular exam), which has not helped my headache.  My eyes are still adjusting and my mind is still in disbelief that what I’m seeing is real.  Add this together with the obsessive nagging I have to deal with from the time I punch in until the time I lock the doors and the pressure behind my eyes was almost unbearable. 

There was only one cure.  I gathered enough change from my change drawer and set off to Chick-fil-A.  While a Dr. Pepper and an order of waffle fries have the combined power of ten Tylenol, I had to settle for the less effective sweet tea and waffle fry combo.  (58 days strong into the Dr. Pepper fast…yahoo?!)  Surely this would ease the throbbing.  Plus I can sit alone and read my book and the crew that works there leaves me alone.  Solitude, peace and manna from heaven.  

However when I pulled into the parking lot a small framed aged woman approached me asking for 85 cents.  I’m not sure what 85 cents does for a person, maybe bus fare, but I lied to her and told her I might have some change when I left.  I actually left with $1.43 in change.

I’m trying to be Christ-like, in fact I’ve been trying for 21 out of my 29 years, and today I lied about 85 cents.  My selfishness refused a woman 85 cents.  Will I ever begin to resemble Jesus?  I could have easily skipped the sweet tea and enjoyed a cup of water instead.  Some days I feel that I have inched no closer to Christ than when I first begun this journey. 

As I sat in the booth thinking about this, no longer able to enjoy my afternoon retreat, the sound system in the restaurant began to play Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone) by Chris Tomlin.  I couldn’t help but be overwhelmed by the incredible love of our God.  My enormous selfishness cannot compare to the immense love of God. 

 

Rich Mullins called it “the wreckless raging fury”.  Actually I feel the need to print the entire songs lyrics.  Kind of a meditative release for me.  Otherwise I’ll end up crying again, which caused a few uncomfortable glances from the Chick-fil-A crowd.  No one needs that.

 

The Love of God

By Rich Mullins

 

There's a wideness in God's mercy
I cannot find in my own
And He keeps His fire burning
To melt this heart of stone
Keeps me aching with a yearning
Keeps me glad to have been caught
In the reckless raging fury
That they call the love of God

Now I've seen no band of angels
But I've heard the soldiers' songs
Love hangs over them like a banner
Love within them leads them on
To the battle on the journey
And it's never gonna stop
Ever widening their mercies
And the fury of His love

Oh the love of God
And oh, the love of God
The love of God

Joy and sorrow are this ocean
And in their every ebb and flow
Now the Lord a door has opened
That all Hell could never close
Here I'm tested and made worthy
Tossed about but lifted up
In the reckless raging fury
That they call the love of God

 

Quote

I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult.
  - EB White

Inside the Mind...

Read this article today, courtesy of YS’ weekly Update e-mail. 

 

INSIDE THE MIND OF THE BOY DATING YOUR DAUGHTER

 

This article reports that boys on average dated girls to fulfilled a motivation for love and desire to form real relationships.  Very interesting article that suggest that sex is not at the forefront of every teenage boy.  Several conclusions could be reached because of this information.  Enjoy the read.

 

While I am recommending the article, what I recommend more though is the comments that follow.  Check out some of these gems (have you noticed I’ve been using the word “gems” a lot lately…don’t know why…don’t plan on stopping):

 

- “So I wasn’t weird of gay 50 years ago as a teenager when I wanted more from a relationship than just sex.  Now they tell me I was normal.”     – Posted by Rich

- “Though I have not read the study referred to above, I do not sense from the summary that the authors have interpreted their results with the greatest reliability.  Teenage boys would not be the first humans to ascribe nobler reasons for their desires.”     – Posted by Lewis

- “…By the way, from what I’ve seen of the way teenage girls dress, if all the boys DID think about was sex, it would be hard to blame them!”     - Posted by A Boy’s Mom

- “…I don’t care why a teenage boy is after my daughter, I still don’t trust him.  I remember being a teenager boy myself.  Buy hey, I still don’t trust my brother-in-law either.  I don’t care if they’re grandparents now, stay away from my sister!”     - Posted by Rick

-  “None of this is gonna to stop me from cleaning my shotgun when my daughter’s prom date comes to pick her up.  These punks have got one thing on their minds, and it ain’t relationships.”     – Posted by brian

- “This is only a surprise to women.  Any male knows that he was desperately in love at fifteen in a way he never would be again.     – Posted by Brad

- “Boys lie.  Nuff said.”     - Posted by Jessie

 

There are several more that are rather insightful. 

 

 

Fighting for Peace?

Tony Jones wrote yesterday on his experience at the National Pastors Convention in San Diego.  Specifically at the end of his post he wrote: 

“Then I led the conversation about politics.  It was pretty spicy as I recounted my journey out of Hauerwasianism, Andy took an Augustinian tack, and Scot vehemently defended the utopian dream that he calls Anabaptism. :-)  My bottom line: it just was not possible to sustain the Christian enclave that the Hauerwasian mafia prescribes when I was a pastor.  I ministered to cops and military personnel, and I just didn’t have the luxury to hold fast to my ideals in the midst of real ministry.” (highlighted section by me)

 

Stanley Hauerwas, just in case, is a theologian, ethicist and professor of law and Duke Divinity School.  Wikipedia describes Hauerwas in this way:

“In his career, he has attempted to emphasize the importance of virtue and character within the Church. He has been an outspoken Christian pacifist and has promoted nonviolence, having been mentored by Mennonite theologian John Howard Yoder. Hauerwas has also been an opponent of nationalism, particularly American patriotism, arguing that it has no place in the Church. His writings occasionally veer into the area of paleo-orthodoxy, though Hauerwas himself might dispute this claim. He has also been associated with the narrative theology movement.”

 

I really appreciate the statement by Tony Jones.  Attempting to live and preach and demonstrate peace yet struggling because of the culture we live in.  I might be reading into his comment a little too much, but these are the thoughts that were generated through it.

I know a lot of guys who idealize Hauerwas stance and I’m just not there.  Maybe some of it is my childhood, having grown up a military dependent.  Or maybe some of it is from having worked for the Air Force (in the chapel program and other areas).  Maybe it’s just a part of my worldview (which I can’t always explain), which believes that there is something in the nature of a boy/man that needs to accept and endure conflict, struggle and pain (probably needs more flushing out or better wording, but hopefully you know what I mean).

Nevertheless I think that while one man (and I use “man” in its generic gender understanding) endures injustice I have the responsibility to respond.  First via politics, second but peaceful aggression (which is how I see the actions of MLK and Gandhi, not just peaceful demonstrations), and third by force. 

I believe that peace is the luxury only of the ignorant and that peacemakers set aside their peace in order to bring about peace. 

This isn’t just an issue of war or physical conflict.  If I have deep resources that others are lacking in excess I believe that making peace would challenge me to humble myself and my resources in order that others could benefit.  For instance a mom going through a divorce e-mailed me today asking if I had a listing of babysitters telling me that she was in need of some “breaks” away from her two boys.  Me, being in excess of time and lounging around resources, in order to make peace offered to have her boys over for some serious Wii time.  Maybe visit the batting cages.  Or plug in a movie.  All stuff I would do anyways, so the sacrifice isn’t actually that great.

I definitely don’t think I have this all figured out, but if I were to give you a snapshot of where I am currently in my thinking of all this - the above would be pretty close. 

I am sure of this though, “He must increase, I must decrease.” (John 3:30)

 

Maybe you have some thoughts.  I would love to hear them. 

Link Recommendation

In response to Be Kind Rewind, Filmmaking Frenzy is posting homemade video tributes to some people’s favorite movies.  Check it out.

 

TSH

ABCNEWS.com: Girlfight Explodes On School Bus

You have received this ABCNEWS.com mail from:

tsharrisonis@gmail.com

(more e-mail testing, this time from ABCNews)

This is a rather complicated situation.

Who do you side with?

Do you think we are heading to a time where we will not have school buses or where every school bus will have a ride along police or security officer?

I know people talk about times being worse than yesteryear, but I'm having memories flashes of incidents on my bus rides in middle school.

Girlfight Explodes On School Bus
http://abcnews.go.com/Video/playerIndex?id=4329813

Somewhere beyond the sky

I first learned of Larry Norman and his music when my mom brought home a copy A Thief in the Night.  Scared the hell out of me!  Even today when I walk into a home or room where I expect people and find no one, I begin to sweat. 

Later on I learned more of Larry’s music and his influence in the Christian music world thru a compilation CD.

Now I know that some will curse Larry Norman for his influence of Christian music, but I don’t think we can credit LN for Christian’s failing to achieve a greater success and creativity.  But I don’t want to get on a soap box.

Rather I read this final letter of Larry today and thought it was pretty amazing.  Someday, if Christ continues to tarry on, when I die I hope to have this kind of assurance and conviction. 

READ:

 

I feel like a prize in a box of cracker jacks with God’s hand reaching down to pick me up. I have been under medical care for months. My wounds are getting bigger. I have trouble breathing. I am ready to fly home.

My brother Charles is right, I won’t be here much longer. I can’t do anything about it. My heart is too weak. I want to say goodbye to everyone. In the past you have generously supported me with prayer and finance and we will probably still need financial help.

My plan is to be buried in a simple pine box with some flowers inside. But still it will be costly because of funeral arrangement, transportation to the gravesite, entombment, coordination, legal papers etc. However money is not really what I need, I want to say I love you.

I’d like to push back the darkness with my bravest effort. There will be a funeral posted here on the website, in case some of you want to attend. We are not sure of the date when I will die. Goodbye, farewell, we will meet again.

 

Goodbye, farewell, we’ll meet again
Somewhere beyond the sky.
I pray that you will stay with God
Goodbye, my friends, goodbye.

 

Larry

 

Stick It In The Fridge

I’ve bought into the Vitamin Water craze.  Not necessarily because I think there is something special in the concoction that will enhance my intellect or health.  Mainly because I’m still keeping up with my Dr. Pepper fast and some days I just don’t want any tea. 

So now I’m occasionally spending too much money on what I can get for free in my faucet.  I know a lot of people fall for the “tap water is bad” theory, but I don’t.  I figure I’ve been drinking it all my life and I’m doing fine. 

But back to the Vitamin Water.  I was reading the label a few days back and found it quite humorous.  Check it out.

“for best results, stick it in the fridge.”

 

Not refrigerate….nope just “stick in the fridge.”

 

Just so you know…I stuck it in the fridge.

 

Review and Excerpts

So I’ve been reading this delightful and insightful book. Have you read it?
So far I give it a rousing review.

Here’s some gems I read today:

• “I’m pouring over religious study books, desperately trying to get a handle on this topic [the Bible’s language laws] and every other. My reading list grows exponentially. Every time I read a book, it’ll mention three other books I feel I have to read. It’s like a particularly relentless series of pop-up ads. [I’ve been there, how about you?] pg. 29
• [While traveling to an Amish community] “The trip takes four hours. Incidentally, I’m proud to say that I had absolutely no urge to make a double entendre when we passed Intercourse, Pennsylvania, which I see as a moral victory.” pg. 31
• “The problem is, a lot of religion is about surrendering control and being open to radical change. I wish I could stow my secular worldview in a locker at the Port Authority Bus Terminal and retrieve it at the end of the year.” [Jacobs is confronted with the fact that living out the Bible for a year is going to bring about life changes in him that he may not have been prepared for. Certainly following Jesus has done that to me.]

I’ll keep you informed of any more brain busters.

TSH

Recommended Listen

I listened to another great sermon today.  Matt Proctor, President of Ozark Christian College, preached a sermon I’ve heard before still good and worth a listen by you too (I think he was a last minute fill-in for someone else and this was the “go-to” sermon…not bad).

 

Click HERE for the sermon originally entitled The Power of Behold.  (Click HERE for the recording I first heard back in 1999…I kinda prefer it more...but the sound quality is not as good.)

 

Some gems from the sermon, which is on Rev. chapter 1, John’s vision of Jesus.:

-          “…they (the seven churches of Revelation) have taken the Lion of Judah and they have declawed Him.  They have made him a little household pet, makes a great mascot doesn’t have to be Master.”

-          “When I got married, I wanted to take my wife Katie somewhere exotic.  So I took her to Kansas City.”  (a joke)

-          “This Jesus here, he blazes with supernova brilliance.  He speaks in Niagara thunder. This Jesus can take our planet and he can play kickball with it.  He can flick his finger and send our solar system spinning off into space.  This is the Jesus who in Genesis chapter 1, John chapter 1, takes a handful of words and he just speaks ten thousand galaxies into existence.  This is huge and holy.  This Christ is clothed in splendor and majesty and glory and authority and you don’t walk into his presence casually. And that’s why a lady named Annie Dillard said, “…if you realized how powerful is this Christ into who’s presence you come, you’d take off your silly hats… and you would come to church with crash helmets on.”

-          “Jesus is not just a smiling buddy who will just wink at our sin and let us do whatever we want.  He is a towering furious figure who will not be managed.  He is Lord.  And He is among our churches.  And He knows our sin.  And He is big enough to do something about it.

 

Make sure you listen to it all.  I can’t imagine that the number of friends that I have who read this, that one of you doesn’t desperately need to hear this today. 

 

And because Matt’s my friend and I think he’s an amazing preacher I encourage you to check out some of his other sermons HERE.

 

“Behold”

TSH

Test 1, 2 Test

I'm testing out blogging remotely from e-mail. 

Today I started reading this...

Outstanding!

 

Makes me want to read this even more.

 

Poop Lovin'

Mental Floss posted today 5 Things I Didn't Know About Poop.  I was eating some dinner while reading it, which was slightly unfortunate, but was too amazed over these facts to set down my chicken cordon bleu. 

 

For some reason I don't want to post them on my blog, so I'll let you link there yourself.

Answers (Part 3)

Continuing to answer Julie's questions.

49. books I wish I had read
so many, so very many, but here's one specifically...
I really want to read this book. You can read the first chapter on his website.

Accumulation (Part 2)

Wow!
I got a lot of responses of people begging me not relinquish my precious treasures.
Just so you know, some of that post was a little tongue in cheek...

However I do want to be the person who could easily walk away from what I hold as value. I love the story of Elisha as he chooses to follow Elijah, and how he slaughters his flock and leaves nothing behind.

I want to be that.

But be assured that the comics, and cards, and CDs (good and bad), and books are all safe and sound.

Oh one last thing...

In the ninth grade I refused to date a girl because she had longer arm hair than me. [Later I came to realize everyone has longer arm hair than me, I like the bald man of arm hair.] Seriously I wouldn't let a girl force me to get rid of "my precious-s-s-s".

Well...maybe...

Atonement

Here's a recent clip from ER.


What hope do you have to offer someone dying and seeking atonement. Do we know a real God who provides real answers?

How would you have answered this man?

Two Great Sermons

I listened to two amazing sermons today.
First Mark Moore's
The centrifugal Nature of Jesus' commands.
Mark is a professor at Ozark Christian College, and is a brilliant communicator and theologian. You should check out his website for further sermons or class lectures.
This sermon is about the call of missions and the centrality of Christ in your life.

Second Jon Weece's
Ready to Surrender
Jon is the senior minister at Southland Christian Church in Lexington, KY. Currently he is in a series entitle coming up to BREATHE. The previous week Mike Breaux (formerly of Southland and Willow Creek) taught on being broken. Jon continues with the idea of once we are broken we must surrender.

If you got a moment take a listen.